Gin-san is a Gin-chan!
by ShadowRavenTricksterDedz
Summary: It was only a mission to exterminate bugs so...how the Hell did this happened to him? One day he is Gin-san and now he is Gin-chan, attracting males left and right. And does he really have to mention he lost his dick? Shit. Rated T to be safe but it may get higher...dunno.
1. Chapter 1

**SRTD: First of all, I haven't even read half of the Manga yet so I don't know much and I'm only writing this cause I'm so freaking bored. Just read it and review if you want me to continue. If not, then I shall delete it with no worries. **

**Prologue**

When Gin-san woke up the next morning after an extremely bad day yesterday that included a very scary bug extermination, which was annoying considering that the extermination was inside a freaking laboratory which means they had to be careful not to break anything or they won't get any pay, he felt only two things.

First, he felt as though his dick is missing for some odd reason, which is something that he thought as some side effect after pissing off Shinpachi's sister yesterday and got hit right at the nuts. He mentally prayed that the woman didn't cut it off in his sleep and sold it off into a black market or something.

The second thing he felt was this heavy sensation on his chest that made it hard for him to breathe. This was even much heavier than being sat on by Sadaharu, which was saying quite a lot since the freaking dog is as huge as his freaking pole. And trust him, Kagura ordered the freaking dog to sit on him the last time he stole a sukonbu so he knows exactly how it feels.

Yawning, he stretched his arms up high and blindly walked outside his room, eyes closed with clothes in hand, already memorized the place without needing to look. He continued this with a scratch on his bared stomach which felt oddly soft and smooth against his hand. Gin-san blamed it on the strawberry milk he kept on drinking. It told him it worked wonders on your skin if taken in amount.

Upon reaching the bathroom, he wore his clothes without opening his eyes and cursed loudly when he bumped into someone before falling on a soft warm thing under him, stopping the painful fall he would have met, with a loud yelp coming from a very familiar voice.

He opened his eyes, about to make some bored remark that would surely be returned with a loud one but paused when he noticed the four-eyed teen blushing like a tomato and his eyes bulging as though it was going to pop out of his skull.

"Ah. Shinpachi...did you catch a cold from chasing that idol you loved so much in the rain yesterday, that you're so red like my favorite boxers?" Gin-san blinked. Was it his imagination...or was his voice sounded higher than usual? "Hmm...I think I caught a cold too...my voice is different."

Then all of a sudden, the teen below him shot up and yelled out, "GIN-SAN?!" with his hands hard on **(Tucker: Bow chicka bow wow) **Gin's shoulders.

With scrunched eyebrows, he asked, "Huh? Of course it's me, who else do you know that has a natural silver perm hair like mine?"

For a few seconds, the teen was panting like he ran a marathon around the whole Japan, a look of disbelief written on his boyish face. "This...this is a dream, right? Just a nightmare that got worse because I ate Gin-san's favorite strawberry shortcake when he was sleeping?"

Hearing the annoying muttering, a low growl escaped his lips, a dark aura coating him as though a demon possessed him. "You're the culprit who ate my cake?! Bastard! I swear I'm going to feed the tickets you bought to Sadaharu! In fact, I'm going to make sure you will never get the pay for yesterday!"

"You bitch! Do you know how long I worked hard for the damn tickets?! Nothing you can do will ever stop me from going to the concert! It would take a miracle to ever go against the mighty leader of Otsuu-chan's fan club!" Shinpachi yelled over the top of his lungs, clearly enraged at the thought of his tickets disappearing from his greedy hands. "And what do you mean pay?! You never give me or Kagura-chan our deserved pays anyways so stop talking as though you are the Queen of Kabuki-cho!" After finishing his tirade, he took a deep breath to calm himself.

The four-eyes interrupted him even before he could retort to that statement. Seriously? Queen of Kabuki-cho? The Hell is this four-eyes yapping about? He was only seconds away from punching the other's face for daring to interrupt him, when he heard something weird. "Give me a second to scream while I still can. Then, I shall finally die in peace in this bad dream that involves an alien that looks and acts a lot like Gin-san. Besides, there is only one woman in my life that I shall ever let to lie down on me. It doesn't include Onee-san, it doesn't include Kagura-chan and it especially doesn't include you, Gin-_**chan**_." He said seriously with a hand raised as if to stop him, staring at his face, then his chest, then to his...lower half.

Then he screamed.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH!" And he promptly fainted with blood gushing out of his nose like a freaking waterfall.

Raising an eyebrow, he glanced down to himself and...

All Hell break loose.

**SRTD: I think it's already obvious what they saw, ne?**

**Please vote in the poll I'm creating for the pairing. And as for the warnings for this story, I'll post it at Chapter One. So please read the notes I'm going to write if you want to know what you'll hate or not.**


	2. Chapter 2

**SRTD: Yo, minna-san~! I'm back~! Sorry for the delay but here's the Chapter One I promised all of you. It's a bit late but I do hope you enjoy it! ^.^**

**Warning/s: Slash (depends on how you look at it), FemGin, Possible HaremXFemGin, A lot of cursing that is not fit for children (duh), and Hentai. Lots and lots of nosebleed as well. Maybe a fountain? No. A flood? Nevermind!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gintama. If I did, well…let's just say that Gin would be having a very miserable life in the hands of a freaking sadistic yaoi fan girl and he will never know the culprit! Mwahahahahahaha!**

…**With that said, on with the story! Hehe~!**

**Chapter One – It's not April fool's Day so don't play a joke on me, you bastard! **

What happened?

One moment he was looking at Shinpachi, who was looking quite pale and was bleeding on the ground like some pervert in a hot spring and then...then? Then what?

…

Wait...Bleeding?!

A pair of blood red eyes snapped open, staring blankly at the ceiling for a minute's pause before its owner heaved himself up to look around the place. He blinked lazily.

Where?

"So you finally wake up, eh, Gintoki-chan?" An elder woman's voice drawled out, the smell of smoke wafting through the place told him who exactly is sitting right next to him.

"Why am I in a hospital, old hag?" Gin-san asked as politely as he could with a hand massaging his temples, sighing. You can't really blame him for his rude comment. With his head pounding as though he was hit by a bulldozer, he really couldn't talk as he "normally" would to the woman.

Said woman ignored him in favor of puffing another circular smoke from her ruby red lips. "You nearly gave us a heart attack, you know? Though I guess Kagura-chan looked quite ecstatic with your new look. At first, she was having quite a panic attack, destroying all the place like the idiot that she is. By the way, you have to pay for the mess she made. Seriously, I don't know why you keep on letting her stay if you don't even teach her how to hold back." She complained with a sigh. "Still, after calming down, she said that she was glad she has a mother now instead of a father. She even added that you were already a mother in a father's body. Really, my head is still aching because of it. Ah, I'm too old for this."

In her long speech, she noticed the said person getting out of the hospital bed, moving towards the bathroom. She figured she'll just watch the other figure out what just happened and leaned back casually on the chair as though she was just watching some movie. Hmm…she forgot to bring some popcorn. It would surely fit the situation right now.

"No, I don't know. I was unconscious remember? And no way, I haven't even earned enough to pay the damn rent. Yesterday wasn't even half of what we agreed with the stupid bastard." He scowled as he heard his voice. It seems as though he was still sick, his usually tenor voice turning more and more feminine by the minute. The Hell? "And what do you mean by mother? Has Catherine been feeding her one of those…?" He trailed off, his eyes widening at "his" appearance on the mirror.

Huh?

He stepped back out of the mirror's view for a moment to scrub his sleepy eyes. That was only an imagination…That was only an imagination… He thought before walking back in front of the mirror.

"Oi. Old hag, did you paste a picture of a woman that looks just like me when I was asleep? 'Cause I think Shinpachi and even Kagura couldn't do something as stupid as this." He asked with a drawling voice, checking out the picture the woman was giving him. He ignored the moving lips when he was talking, thinking that it was just some sort of alien device that could imitate exactly what he was doing. A prank. A huge stupid but incredible prank.

The woman, Gin-chan, he thought, looked almost like him if it weren't for the long messy silver hair that wasn't permed like his and reached past her waist, only to fall like a river around her sensual curvy form that reminded him of an hourglass he saw once in an antique shop. Her flawless pale white skin almost melted with the silver because of its paleness that could even rival the snow in a winter season. He would've described her as a ghost if it weren't for her pink pouty lips and hypnotizing crimson red eyes that seemed to draw him in, calling him and tempting him to move towards her so that he could wrap his strong arms around her. No, she isn't a ghost. She's a freaking succubus.

He raised a hand as if to reach for her then…stopped, freezing like a statue when he saw his hand. All of a sudden, he felt like he was in a horror movie.

"No way." "He" muttered under his breath, almost like a whimper preparing for an assault. "No freaking way."

He raised both hands to stare at it. Both equally pale, small, slim, and soft. Like a girl's. Then he saw the woman in the mirror also imitating his own movements.

In the heat of the moment, he dropped his hands and gazed down in horror at the sight that greeted him.

Barely hidden by a long green hospital gown, was a pair of mounds that vaguely reminded him of valleys and mountains by the way it stretched the gown up, showing a lot of pale white skin that could make any men blush and faint in its perverseness. He moved to touch it, hands shaking as they poked at it as if they were some sort of specimen before cautiously grabbing them both in hand.

He yelped at the shock that ran down his body.

"W-Wha…?" He quickly dropped them, then gulped. His pole. His pole must still be there, right? Still alive and breathing like his own heart, right?

He shoved all thoughts away and quickly gripped the gown. _UP_.

Today is a very normal day for Japan. Despite being invaded by these Amanto, they are now moving forward and are now living a life that is influenced by these powerful creatures. The birds are chirping, the sakura trees are blooming. Yes. Yes. Quite a beautifu-!

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHH!"

…

As I was saying. Quite a beautiful morning, neh? Silent, calm, and peacefu-!

"WHERE THE HELL IS MY FUCKING DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCK!"

…You know what? Nevermind.

**~GIN-CHAN~**

Setsuna-sama is a very well-known scientist in Japan, and is a highly intelligent one as well, if he says so himself. With the Amanto dying left and right during those times with the war against the Samurai, he gathered their bodies and did what he did best. Experimenting. Because of it, he has gained a lot of wealth and power that could rival even the mightiest Shogun's since the Amanto reached the land of the Rising Sun.

So why the Hell is he running from a very pissed good-looking woman who is supposed to be loved by all men, and even women, and is instead being feared like he was doing now?

Well…why don't I explain it all for you?

Yesterday, and it was a very good day as well, a new recruit got a bad mistake that could destroy the Earth if not taken care of quickly, accidentally opened the cage that held the rare species known as the "Hell Bugs".

Hell Bugs are known –and feared- for their incredibly painful bites and stings that could lead into extreme hallucination, dehydration, and the worst, death. So they evacuated the lab and called for the Shinsengumi.

Sadly, the Shinsengumi was tasked to guard the princess, so they instead called the famous Yorozuya whom Okita-san from the Shinsengumi told them that they could help them with their problem. The people who would do anything for money.

At first, he was skeptical. From only their appearances, they looked useless. The way they fought and how they snap out words that would make anyone annoyed in a matter of seconds. So, he watched them, feeling annoyed at their insolence. It was then, when they took care of the problem like it wasn't a life and death situation that he believed that he picked the right one to call.

They were amazing, especially the silver-haired man with a natural perm. Despite his dead eyes and irritating personality that is both annoying and endearing, he finished it with a smile. Something the Japanese people are lacking these days.

So, after the problem was solved, he thought:

He would never see the man again. It was almost a sad thought since the man was a very strange one. An enigma. And how he love solving puzzles.

So imagine his surprise when he got a call from the very same place the next morning. An old woman that goes by the name Otose-san told him something that he dreaded immensely not to happen.

Someone turned into a girl. And unfortunately…that someone was that Sakata Gintoki that he thought he would never see again.

"DIE, YOU FUCKING BASTARD!" The "woman" with the silver hair roared behind him, startling everyone who was passing by.

Right now though, he didn't know whether or not he was lucky he'll see the man -or woman in this case- again, he thought as he dodged a syringe that was aimed for his head. Amazing that even though he was stuck inside a laboratory all day and night, he can still run like he was in a marathon.

"Wait! L-Let me explain!"

"There's nothing to explain! All you're going to do is stay there so that I can fucking murder you on the spot and laugh while I'm doing it!" Gintoki-san ordered, all the while throwing a wheelchair at him. "Do you know what it feels like to have your dick cut off?!"

"No! Please! Don't! Please forgive me!" He plead.

"Well, it seems you don't! Why don't I show you?!" She suggested, as though she didn't heard his pathetic scream of pleas, waving around a…wait. His eyes widened in fear. Is that a chainsaw?! Shit!

He quickened his pace, didn't bothered to glance back at the horrifying sight of a woman threatening to cut his dick off with a huge scary chainsaw. A Shinigami, he shouted in his head. A freaking Shinigami is here to kill his sweet precious! ( My Precious~! - Gollum)

"Don't worry!" She claimed, slamming down to chainsaw to the ground before raising it again when she wasn't able to hit her target. "This won't hurt!" And stroke again, scaring a passerby by the corner. "Much!"

"Wait!" He paused, panicking as he dodge another attack. "I'll, I'll make an antidote!" He yelled on the top of his lungs, eyes shut tight with his arms in the air as though they could stop the attack that she would deliver him.

A pause.

He peeked through his hands, gulping at the sight of the chainsaw just a few inches away from him. The Shinigami woman had her eyes shadowed by her long silver bangs, hiding the two golden orbs that could cut through anything with a single glance.

"What was that?" Gintoki-san muttered.

"I-I'll make an antidote. T-To return you to your true g-gender." He stuttered, his words almost a whisper. He didn't dare move or inch away from the woman, afraid that it would only continue their frightening chaos of infinity. "T-That would be okay. R-Right?"

Then as if the switch was flipped, Gintoki-san smiled a very beautiful smile that made his breath hitch. Like an angel, he thought with a blush, then shook his head. It was the complete opposite of what she was earlier ago.

"Good! I thought you hated me for some reason old man! Because you suddenly turned me to a fucking woman!" Her voice was so sweet, he would have turned into a pile of goo if he hadn't heard the threat lying underneath that sweet trap.

He nodded frantically, gulping and sweating anxiously. "N-No way would I hate you, G-Gintoki-san." He laughed nervously.

Slowly, she lowered the chainsaw and lost the soft smile on her face, her golden eyes growing bored by the second. "Okay. I'll be leaving then, old man. Ja." And without further ado, she disappeared like the wind.

He sighed. Oh, he's going to be nursing the mother of headaches after this. He's sure of it.

**~GIN-CHAN~**

**SRTD: Aaaaaahhhh… I'm so bored. Anyways, I just finished this earlier this morning so don't blame me if you find it horrible. I'm so sleepy and so bored~! The poll for the pairing won't be up yet since my other poll (the one for the Dance of the Howling Darkness story) is still up. You can just review to vote for the pairing. Remember, it has to be a male.**


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